Lately, nothing makes my nether-regions tingle more than the virtual cork-board, Pinterest, that is fucking over every single groom to be. Yes, I too have caught the social-media Pin bug. I spend my paid hours at work pinning and my nights drinking to forget that my fairy-tail wedding is missing one key component: someone to kiss at "I do" and plow at "Your parents were so generous to buy us a cruise to the Caribbean!" I'm dreading the day when I date a guy who Googles me and finds my wedding board. "Oh…that ring? No I don't need one that large; I'll settle just like I settled for you to please my parents so they'll stop bitching about grandchildren!" If they only knew the preventative measures I've taken to make sure that the only thing I'll be calling my babies for a while are my Louboutins….
Those shoes scream fuck me….
…..and buy me the ring that I pinned last week on my board.
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